Have you heard of her before? 😅 This is the first blog post of The Happi Life and I feel like it's the most important topic to start with.
As moms, we do this thing where we just simply forget ourselves. It's like from the moment I became pregnant, a switch flipped that said "I no longer come first, it's all about this kiddo now." which is fine and common but kind of inaccurate.
It's not ALL about the kiddo now. A child coming into your world does not mean that you are no longer important. It does not dismantle who you were before you peed on stick.
I remember going back to work after maternity leave and just feeling stressed. Physically I was cleared to go back but emotionally, I didn't feel like myself and I was hit with mom guilt for a 101 reasons.
My days typically went from rushing and chaos in the morning trying to get everyone where they needed to be to a battle with the clock at the end of the day trying to have quality time, make dinner, clean, night routines and prepare for the next day.
Continuing this pattern made me constantly stressed, sad, moody, snappy, defensive and easily agitated.
I just so desperately wanted someone to see my struggle and just help without me having to say anything. I wasn't doing it alone and I still felt unheard and alone.
If this sounds familiar, you are doing nothing but depriving yourself of self-love, healthiness, happiness, positivity, the ability to appropriately manage your emotions...basically anything that makes you feel good and live the life you want to live.
Here's the cold hard truth..
SELF CARE IS A CHOICE AND YOU ARE NOT CHOOSING YOURSELF.
It's one thing to complain but it's another thing to complain and take action.
What really is self care?
Self care is a commitment you make to yourself to show up for yourself everyday. It's the practice of caring for you happiness, health and wellbeing.Whether you're working for joy, necessity or both, working as a mom means that you have to get creative about the ways you work in your self care.
Examples of Self Care
Here are some creative ways to add in some self care to your every day.
1. Take a self care walk
Taking a self care walk is one of the easiest forms of self care to cater to your mental and physical health. Walking for at least 20 minutes a day can alleviate stress and give your mind a boost.Walking can be done even if your not the most active person in the world (because I sure know I’m not) and it can really be done at whatever pace you feel comfortable.
The best way for my to get my walk in is right after I come home from the park day. I just throw on some shorts and sneakers and walk around my neighborhood. It allows me to release the stressful work day and after my shower, I feel like I’m in a better headspace.
Benefits of Walking
1. Boost brain functioning
2. Lightens your mood and increases happiness
3. Helps you breathe better
4. Helps with chronic pain5. Decreases stress
2. Protect your peace at bed time
Now I’m not saying that protecting your peace shouldn’t be a daily practice but I think bed time is the universal moment of peace for mommas. After night routine and the kiddos are in bed. “Clock out” and make this time YOUR time.Develop a bed time routine with your kiddos. This will not only create structure around bedtime but it will also create predictability so that bed time is smoother and you have an allotted time to yourself to look forward to.
Communicate this boundary to your family.
3. Eat a healthy meal, not your kiddos leftovers
Now I KNOW I cannot be the only one. I got into this habit where meal times weren't about me, they were for my son. I prioritized making sure he was eating healthy, enough and on a schedule but instead I got whatever he couldn't eat. Pre-mom life I was not like that. Stop making it complicated and make yourself a healthy meal as well or just make enough so that you can eat too. Your body's health is important and you'll feel good too.
4. Cozy up with a movie and do nothing
Doing absolutely nothing IS self care. Nothing gets me even more hot and bothered like having nothing expected of me so that I can just chill.Now these moments are far and few between but I make this a possibility by communicating to my partner when I need a break or just making it movie time in the house by allowing the kiddo some scream time.
I'm challenging you to do something that makes you happy today.
